Gaudete! Rejoice!
It’s such an odd thing for the third week of Advent to be Gaudete Sunday, with its imperative to rejoice amid the waiting. It feels more appropriate for Gaudete Sunday to be during Christmastide - Rejoice! He has been born! It seems that this rejoicing is one of anticipation, not of joy fulfilled.
Advent has been different at our house this year. It’s been quieter with just two of us, and our usual traditions have been a bit wobbly. For as long as I can remember we have put up the Christmas tree and decorated the house the day after Thanksgiving. As a teacher (and child of teachers), that rhythm worked to ensure that we weren’t trying to decorate *and* manage a school schedule at the same time. This year I hosted some workshops on Friday and Saturday after Thanksgiving, and Eliana wanted to be part of putting up the tree, so we didn’t decorate until the first week of December, and we still don’t have a tree up.
Christmas is in ten days.
Eliana comes home tomorrow.
I remember the Advent I was pregnant with Eliana, anticipating the birth of my own child as we anticipated the birth of Mary’s. This year, though, the waiting is different. It is not the first coming of my child that I anticipate, but her return. And it makes for a different sort of Advent.
I have heard the argument that we shouldn’t observe Advent, feigning the wait time for an event that already happened. And I have rebutted that in Advent we do not just await the first coming of Christ, but his second coming as well. But this year I am gaining a new appreciation for what that means, just by waiting for the one I love to return again.
Bernard of Clairvaux, a twelfth century monk and Doctor of the Church1, wrote2 that Christ comes to us in three ways: “The first, when He came through His Incarnation; the second is daily, when He comes to each one of us, by His grace; and the third, when He will come to judge the world.”3 Most of us have our attention turned to the first coming this time of year. Having just been through the book of Revelation, I have my attention turned to the eschatological implications of the incarnation this year, in particular. But of course, as we remember in the Eucharist, Christ has died, Christ is risen, and Christ will come again. What does that mean that Christ is risen but that He is here with us in all places and at all times through the power of His spirit? It is a mystery, and not one I usually consider when I think of Advent.
As usual, God is using the moments of my life, and specifically my life as a parent, to unfold an understanding of what it is to be in relationship with Him. I gained new insight into God’s love for me when I became a parent myself. Now, having crossed the threshold into this new stage of parenting, I am acutely aware of what it is to be present to someone who is not physically present. It is uncanny how much space a person can occupy in your heart and mind when they do not occupy the space around you. But still, we connect. We talk, we text, we Marco Polo. And all of that continues to foster relationship, but does not compare to being in the same room together. My empty-nested understanding of prayer holds a little more depth than it did last year. Prayer holds all of the anticipation of a face-to-face visit with such intensity that tomorrow is not soon enough and you need to connect today, even if it is just a hint of the joy that is coming. Prayer is a foretaste of joy born from the anticipation of that joy fulfilled.
Tomorrow, Lord willing, we will be in the same place at the same time, in the same room together, and I can barely wait.
I think that’s the most appropriate feeling for Advent and I’m so thankful for it this year. Gaudete!
Traditions: What’s Working Right Now
I mentioned that our traditions are a bit wobbly right now. There are still some traditions that linger, with or without children in our home. Here are a few that we’ve been enjoying in this season:
Peppernuts for St. Nicholas Day - It doesn’t feel like the holidays without Peppernuts (recipe below or from my old, old blog here)
Christmas Stroll - Leif and I made a date night of our town’s downtown Christmas Stroll this year. Apparently, most of our age group no longer participates in this (cue the curmudgeonly grumbles of “It’s too crowded” and “It’s not like it used to be), but we enjoyed ourselves.
Saffron Buns for Santa Lucia Day - We had no Santa Lucia with her candle-lit crown this year, but we did enjoy a breakfast of Saffron Buns and Cardamom butter in the early light on Santa Lucia Day this year.
Holden Evening Prayer - So many of the Holden Evening Prayer songs have become part of the soundtrack of my year. I anticipate this sung prayer service during Advent each year, held at the Lutheran church just down the street from my house. This community was a liturgical way station on my journey to the observances I hold now, and I am thankful for their ever-warm welcome when I return for these Advent services.
Advent Wreath - we have a gold Advent wreath that I picked up at Target years ago and still love. It sits at the center of our table, and during Advent we eat dinner (and breakfast) by the growing light of its candles.
Taize - Taize isn’t usually an Advent tradition, but it is a tradition I have come to love over the last several years, and this year our church hosted the December Taize prayer gathering offered by campus ministries each month.
Offerings: A Recipe and a Recommendation
I have been utterly enchanted by the tiniest little book by Susanna Clarke this Advent. It’s short and lovely and perfect for an evening read by the light of the Christmas tree, while eating peppernuts (recipe below).
He was given the title Doctor Mellifluus, a reference to his teaching that was “sweet as honey.” Side note: Mellifluous has been one of my favorite words since college, when I made a point to work it into as many papers as I could. I think I managed five.
He wrote this in Sermo 5, In Adventu Domini (Sermon 5, On the Coming of the Lord)
This summary is quoted here. What he actually says, in the 1966 translation from the Cistercians of his full works, pages 188-190, is: “We know that the coming of the Lord is threefold...The first coming was in flesh and weakness, the middle coming is in spirit and power, and the final coming will be in glory and majesty. This middle coming is like a road that leads from the first coming to the last. At the first, Christ was our redemption; at the last, he will become manifest as our life; but in this middle way he is our rest and our consolation. If you think that I am inventing what I am saying about the middle coming, listen to the Lord himself: 'If anyone loves me, he will keep my words, and the Father will love him, and we shall come to him'.”