It’s that time of year. You know, reflections, resolutions, yada yada yada… We’ve had guests in our home from December 13 to 30, and are hosting a New Year’s Eve(ning) party tonight, so I haven’t had much space for reflection lately. I didn’t realize how much I cherish time to just be. I miss it. The disruption to my regular rhythms sheds a light on which rhythms are really life-giving, something I’m particularly appreciating this week.
Emily P. Freeman shares a year end practice of asking “What worked for me this year?” and “What didn’t work for me this year?” in The Next Right Thing, both her book and her podcast. I stumbled across her book a few years ago when I ordered it for a women’s book group at church, only to discover that I’d ordered the wrong book. I don’t know if I ordered the wrong one or if they sent me the wrong one, but it sat on my shelf for a year or two before I finally picked it up and read it. As is usually the case, it was the perfect book for the season I was in once I finally picked it up. I’ve since used her Next Right Thing Guided Journal a few years now to help me notice what God is doing in my life and discern where He’s inviting me to join Him. I don’t know that I’ve ever made specific lists for what has worked and not worked for me before, but this year I am.
Many years I feel like the same person at the end of the year as I was at the beginning of the year. A little older, a littler wiser, but basically traveling along the same trajectory. This year, though, it feels like my trajectory has shifted over the course of the months. I think the shift started the year before, but this last year is where I’ve watched it gain traction, felt it pull me with it. Perhaps I’ve just been listening better and am in a place where I’m more willing to hold my own plans loosely, more willing to follow. Perhaps I’m just in a place where the future isn’t clear enough to hold tightly, or maybe my hands are just too weary from clinging with certainty to fragments of mystery that I don’t understand.
I can’t tell you a whole lot of what I did this last year. I stepped into some new roles. I stepped out of some old ones. I seem to have written 206 poems, and had several of them published, along with some artwork. I did some deep digging and deep resting in spaces others held for me, and cupped my feeble hands in an attempt to hold that same sort of space for others. I became a little more of who I am. I saw a little more through the Light, and saw the Light a little better through everything else. As John 1:9-12 reads in The Message:
The Life-Light was the real thing: Every person entering Life he brings into Light. He was in the world, the world was there through him, and yet the world didn’t even notice. He came to his own people, but they didn’t want him. But whoever did want him, who believed he was who he claimed and would do what he said, He made to be their true selves, their child-of-God selves.
There is a true self I want to become, and I think I only learn who that is by seeing through the Light of the One who made me. I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, but if I did, I would resolve to become more of the me that I am when the Light shines through me.
A Goal: The Artist’s Way
One of the trajectory shifts this year has been in the direction of artist and poet. To that end, I’m investing a little more in developing myself as a better artist and poet, including spending the first twelve weeks of the year working through Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way. She’s got a few non-negotiables for working through her course, one of which is a weekly check-in. So… I’m going to be checking in here. If you’d like to join me in developing your own habits for cultivating creativity, you can pick up a copy of her book and join me here and check in through the comments! It should take me up to Easter, assuming we start Week 1 next week.
Two Lists: What worked and what didn’t
What worked for me in 2023:
1. Keeping a loose-leaf commonplace book.
2. Starting my weekends with Sacred Saturdays.
3. Eating low-carb vegetarian (and moving toward vegan keto).
4. Meeting with a Spiritual Director.
5. Wearing natural fibers.
6. Making my own clothes.
7. Attending live music in our community.
8. Friday morning coffee with my daughter.
9. Listening to podcasts.
10. Prioritizing spiritual retreats and fika.
What did not work for me in 2023:
1. Working with others in situations that lack clear leadership or direction.
2. Substituting time on my phone for soul-filling rest.
3. Hosting both sides of the family in my home at the same time.
4. Not having a dedicated workspace at my job.
5. Sharing my home office with the dogs.
6. Allowing good things to crowd out essential things.
7. Thinking I would find time to read without actually making time to read.*
8. Not having a plan for dinner.
9. Visual, mental, and physical clutter.
10. Showing up just because others expect me to.
*This is actually true of anything, not just reading. Going to the gym, painting, spending time with friends...
So now it’s your turn… What worked for you in 2023? What didn’t work for you? Is there anything you’re looking forward to in 2024?
I'm looking forward to your posts on The Artist's Way. I began it last fall and got to about Chapter 6, and then I had to take a break from everything to be with family. I'm looking forward to beginning afresh. What works for me is reading a book like this in community (and also when life circumstances cooperate!)
I, too, am guilty of resolving to find time without making time! Laundry, outside-of-school friends, praying... Goodness, the list goes on. Thanks for helping me see one thing I can focus on working with this year!